Are you conflict avoidant ?
Last Update : August 2, 2016
Conflict avoidance is usually related to intimacy killer.
If you think that avoiding conflicts might be better for the health of your relationship, you might be wrong.
It has been shown that people that tend to avoid conflict in a relationship are actually widening the gap in their intimacy.
Indeed, intimacy is strongly related to conflicts. Conflicts with yourself, conflicts with your partners… the first rule to increase intimacy and decrease distance between you two is to stop avoiding conflict.
We all have inner conflicts. Some people do a better job at facing and solving them than others. Tendencies show that people tend to actually ignore their inner conflicts which creates a habit of ignoring any kind of conflict.
Taking full responsibility of your actions, feelings and thoughts is a great way to stop avoiding conflict. Honesty comes here into action. If you can’t be completely honest with yourself it is then almost impossible to be completely honest with your partner. And when honesty is not fully there conflicts might start to happen more often due to lack of communication.
However, communication can also be a source for conflict. Sometimes when a couple has to discuss a rather delicate matter, the conversation can quickly turn into a conflict.
The problem with conflict avoidance is that instead of extinguishing the flame that started the conflict, it feeds it more increasing exponentially the conflict.
#Set the level
There are different kinds of people. Some people are definitely more sensitive than others and some are more direct and perceptive than the rest.
Regardless of your emotional sensitivity, it is quite important to communicate with your partner your feelings towards conflict. That way you will make sure that if and when conflict happens your partner will be aware of your sensitivity and won’t push the conflict to high levels.
Setting some ground rules of reaction to conflict is a very healthy and recommended tactic to face conflict when in a couple and to make sure the fight is worth it. Most importantly make sure to sort out all the issues to finish the conflict with a romantic make up…